Do you ever feel like your multiple versions of the same person? Some days I do. Now I’m not referring to any kind of disorder here, just the different hats we wear in the various roles we play in life, and the traits we allow to shine through in each of them.
I’m talking about the work you, the mum you, the wife you, the entrepreneur your, the friend you and the alone you.
Bet you act different in each role!
I know I do 🙂
It’s not intentional, and in no way does it make you fake or any less authentic. Sometimes there are boundaries and certain behaviors are seen to be appropriate or expected. Other times it is just an accumulation of habits that have formed over time. Most of the time you are probably not even consciously aware of the way you change.
The reason this is coming up for me today is that I feel like I’m not fully sharing myself with you. In fact, I feel like I’m on my best behavior for the most part. You see, in day to day life I’m definitely more of a tomboy. Given the choice between chatting with the girls about the latest fashion or gossip, or talking shit and cracking crude jokes with the guys and watching stupid you tube videos, I’m definitely picking option 2. There is nothing I love more in life than to laugh my arse off. It feels so freeing!
When I write, I write from the heart – just without the f-bombs that would usually slip out if we were having a one on one conversation. Yep, I swear like a trucker. I’m married to one so maybe I’ll use that as my excuse!! Anyway, this seems to come as a surprise to some when they meet me as it’s not something that they’re expecting.
So why am I even writing about this?
Well, today I’m giving myself permission to lighten the fuck up. This is my space to connect with people and not a university assignment or work report or email. There are no rules. Thank god for that because I fucking hate being controlled.
Yes, two f-bombs.
Sorry.
No I’m not 🙂
Maybe I wanted to attempt to be a more professionally spoken version of me, maybe I didn’t want to scare off people who may be uncomfortable with or totally against swearing. Who knows. My parents totally hate swearing, and I do my best to not do it around them. Yet even yesterday when wishing Mum a Happy Mother’s Day and having a good chat, there were at least two accidental farks in there.
Most of the time my swearing is tied to humor. I’m more of a funny fuck than an angry one, lol. Well I’ve probably dumped plenty here and got this all off my chest. Please don’t take this to mean that every post I write going forward will be filled with expletives. Just letting you know that I won’t be apply self censorship to the degree I have over the last year.
Is there anywhere in your life that you feel like you are censoring yourself? Leave a comment!
